The war, anyhow, affected our work and daily conversations with team members. And sometimes, it is difficult to orient yourself on how not to hurt someone with an odd question. Or how to explain to the client what is happening in Ukraine now so as not to diminish the scale of the war and not to lose the contract. And also how to communicate with partners from other countries and not to say something unacceptable.

We have put together simple tips that will be useful in everyday communication. We will share how to communicate with team members to ensure they are okay. And also, if it’s worth raising the issue of the war during small talks with clients.

How to talk to team members so that not to irritate them?

Nataliia Zarubina, Director, Human Resources

Now we are all in a state of stress and uncertainty. That is why it is very important to keep in touch with the team so that your team members feel that they are not alone. But at the same time, it is necessary to be especially delicate and careful with the feelings of others. First of all, if you know that your teammates are in dangerous regions: areas where active hostilities are taking place or close to such places, localities that are actively being shelled, and so on. Further, you will find some tips that will help you in such a situation.

When initiating communication, you should obligatorily have inner resources. It is better not to start a conversation if you are depressed or tired.

Give a person a chance to express him- or herself if it will help feel better. But in no case should you ask an employee if he or she definitely does not want it. Then it is better just to express support.

It is important that such a conversation is individual; it will create a more trusting atmosphere. If communication takes place in a team, it is better to talk about general topics and avoid personal questions.

If you know that someone from your team member’s relatives or friends is serving in the Armed Forces of Ukraine, it is better not to ask how he or she is doing. In such situations, it is crucial to follow the communication ethics rules with those who have such an experience. Simple generalized questions will help: ‘Are you all right?’, ‘What can I do for you?’. If an employee decides to share his or her experiences with you, be an active listener, do not interrupt, and give the employee an opportunity to speak out. Instead, if the employee does not want to talk about a difficult situation for him or her, it is better not to address that topic. The person might consciously avoid potentially traumatic thoughts. In that case, your questions can make an employee worry about the close ones and cause unnecessary pain. In addition, when asking a team member about some details of his or her relatives’ service in the Armed Forces of Ukraine, you may find yourself in a situation when the employee will be wary of telling something superfluous in terms of secrecy.

There are words and expressions that should not be used in communication with team members. At first glance, they may seem appropriate, but it’s not entirely true. In particular, you should avoid expressions that may cause a feeling of devaluation of the person him- or herself or his or her experience and feelings: ‘Do not worry, others are doing even worse.’, ‘I wish I had your problems.’, ‘Focus on work and do not think about the situation around.’, and more. Such words are frustrating and demotivating.

The phrase ‘hold on’ can also have not the most positive connotations. People often use it when they do not know what to say to support the interlocutor. But ‘hold on’ sounds doomed, especially for those who experience the war too hard.

It is also recommended to avoid the expression ‘Everything will be fine.’ Especially when the person is in a dangerous place. People usually say that when they want to support and encourage. But it’s a kind of promise over which you have no power. And what if it is not fine?

‘Oh, poor!’, ‘I feel so sorry for you!’—such expressions drive a person into the position of a victim. In this case, it is better to just actively listen to the interlocutor, allowing him or her to speak out.

You should also give advice carefully. Even if they seem useful to you: ‘Take more walks.’, ‘Use breathing practices to calm down.’, and so on. Yes, it is a sign of care, and sometimes it can be appropriate. But at the same time, those tips can be annoying when a person is unable to follow them due to objective circumstances.

It is also better to refrain from evaluative and instructive judgments such as ‘You shouldn’t have done this, but you should have done that.’, ‘You should have left the city immediately.’, ‘You should have stayed.’ It irritates the interlocutor and does not help establish an atmosphere of trust.

To set the right tone of the conversation and establish contact, you can use the following ‘safe’ phrases: ‘I understand that you are in a difficult situation, and I want to support you. If you are ready, we can talk.’, ‘I sympathize with you, I was in a similar situation. I imagine how difficult it is for you.’, ‘I am worried about you. May I write to you / contact you to find out if you’re all right?’ You can suggest useful information: ‘I have found a set of tips / links that you may need.’ You can ask if your team member has all the necessary contacts or if housing issues have been resolved (if the person has moved temporarily). Reminding the employee about what you can help with—material, information support, and so on—will be appropriate. It can be useful to talk about updates from the last team meeting or town hall.

How to prove to a client that we remain reliable partners even during the war?

Veronika Demedetska, Project Manager

When the war started, I received a lot of messages from clients. Those were the words of support and offers to team members to take days off if necessary. And it was very gratifying that none of the clients even thought of terminating or reducing our cooperation.

I had to conduct a meeting with one of the clients to explain how the cooperation would continue. That need arose because our partners had doubts about whether we would be able to carry out our tasks on time because of the war.

I had enough arguments to convince clients that AMC Bridge is a reliable partner. First of all—the fact that our teammates who were in dangerous regions moved. And those who did not have an opportunity to leave and could not work were temporarily replaced by other team members. So we can continue to perform tasks well. Also, for a certain period of time, I sent a daily status update about each team member. We paid particular attention to data security: everything was moved to the cloud server, so there was no reason to worry.

In general, the experience gained during the pandemic helped us a lot. After all, all we need to work is a laptop, the Internet, and a safe place. Our employees are able and want to work. Clients have agreed to everything, and we continue our productive cooperation.

It’s interesting that today it would probably be harder for me to convince people that everything is fine and that we continue to work and fight. But at the beginning of the war, there was some adrenaline rush that helped a lot.

I often heard the question, ‘How can we help you?’ When former clients asked about it, I thanked them for their interest and support. When it came to financial aid, I sent links to the official pages of reliable charitable foundations. As for current clients, the answer was always the same: keep working and give us tasks because we can support families, the army, and the country that way. And more—the work helps to hold on and focus on a task, not on what is happening around.

I am also often asked what the situation is now. I do not tell reports from the front, of course. But I always say that I am in a relatively safe place and monitor the situation, so if something changes, I am ready to react.

During small talks, I try not to raise the war topic unless I am asked directly about it. And I can say that, in general, the number of such questions has decreased. Teams work stably and efficiently; people no longer move so much. Such a decline in interest may not be good for us as a country, but it is good for business. We look like a stable partner and demonstrate that even during the war, we can perform tasks well and adhere to all previous agreements.

Adjustment for the culture. What should you know when talking to a foreign client?

Kateryna Synakh, Director, Marketing & PR

If you look at how we, Ukrainians, usually do business, in general, you will not find many differences with, let’s say, the culture of the United States or many European countries. It so happens that due to a large number of historical changes and upheavals that have taken place in our country, we are open to other cultures and easily learn from the experience that seems effective to us. In addition, most of the books on communication and management are written by people close to our business culture, to which we are already accustomed in IT. Those are, first of all, authors from the USA and Great Britain. Therefore, we often know and accept those rules as the norm.

For example, it is an entirely American business culture that has taken root in our country: preparing a small plan before the meeting to understand what exactly and in what order to say. And after the meeting—sending an email with the main points that were discussed, plans, and deadlines. Such an approach always works, no matter who you deal with.

However, if you are planning a conversation with a stranger and you do not have time to learn more about the culture of his or her country, there are simple tips to help you feel comfortable. To begin with, you should be open, listen, and analyze more to understand how to build a dialogue, what topics or jokes will be relevant, and which ones will not be suitable. Also, a friendly smile and simple politeness will not hurt in any way.

Small talks are very important to Americans. And if you are simply out of humor or are not very talkative by nature, your interlocutors may think that something has happened to you. A short conversation before discussing work issues helps establish communication in the team and tune in to the discussion and task execution.

But with the British and Germans, for example, small talks or personal conversations are rare. So, don’t wait for questions about how you’re doing. They separate the work and personal life and expect the same from partners.

At the same time, Americans got used to self-identifying through work, while it is not very typical for us. Thus, when we talk to a client from the United States, even during the war, the first thing that will interest the client is the efficiency and smooth work on the project. In their worldview, your personal life should not affect your work. And we got used to making adjustments for what happens in our employees’ lives even if it will affect their performance for a while.

Another thing that Americans will not understand is informing about a problem and nothing about the ways to solve it. If something goes wrong, that’s okay. But you should always have some ideas on how to fix everything and tell what you have already done. In such a case, the communication, which may have seemed difficult, will go smoothly.

Sometimes, it is difficult for us to orient if it is worth talking to clients about the war and situation in the country now. Yes, it is. Our company’s business culture is built on honesty and openness to both good and bad news. But, of course, we should consider how relevant such a conversation is right now. Everyone knows what is happening in Ukraine. But business comes first. The client will be more concerned about the possibility of completing all tasks on time.

And another piece of advice for the talks about the war, which can also be applied in other situations. Many foreigners may find our habit of complaining about circumstances strange. Their culture is not pessimistic. Therefore, even when you talk about difficult things, such as war, a little optimism will not hurt. Yes, sometimes it is very hard for us, but we are fighting, and we will continue to do it, each in his or her own place. Positivity and openness will always find a response from your interlocutor, wherever he may be from.